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social emotional learning

What is the difference between fear of losing and fear of failure?

It’s a given that everyone wishes to win. And now you know that fear of losing simply fosters more winning. Yet, fear of failure is the end of the road. Quitting is the most perfect description for failure and in failure, you will lose. It, failing, is a distraction from the game or project and self-worth is non-existent.

Many young competitors fear throwing a football too short, or putting an incompetent label on an experiment, or fear a grade that is less than an “A” or 4.0, or even fear hitting a ball in the tennis net. When not kept in check, these fears are fears of failure where a participant believes that they have totally failed at the game or project. In actuality, this person or persons may feel unworthy of anything in life including their self-worth. When these examples are presented to a healthier person that fears losing, then they will always want to win more and at a higher rate. This person desires winning more because they don’t translate the losses into failures.

We all know that winning is the best feeling. We’re on top of the world. All things are bound in grand favor with ourselves and others. Many of the greatest people in history hated losing more than winning. Convenient for them that winning was present and their philosophy of fearing losing matched exactly with that of winning. The one that fears failure is the loser. They usually quit their activity in seeming disgrace. However, it is incredible that after many years these persons may give up fear of failure and simply want to win more, and it works for them through trial and error. Not much coaching is offered in this area. The vast majority will remain retired with disgust and failure on their minds and potentially be failures forever.

Personally, I advocate that the word failure not ever be used. In my mind, there are no failures and nothing should be translated into failure by ourselves and those important to us. Failure is a grand attack work that devastates young people. Simply take on your loses for what they are which is not winning. You will then want to win more. You will then excel in all of your endeavors.

life skills for kids

Q: Why should I enroll my child or teenager in Life Coaching?


One of the major reasons for providing life coaching for a youth is to learn emotional skills. In the last 20 years, emotional intelligence has become a bonafide point of learning and development research. For children to succeed now and to be prepared for a successful adult life they must go beyond traditional academic learning. That is largely established to be in the development of emotional intelligence. This can be developed through diverse life experiences and overcoming difficulties. After all, one of the finest achievements in life should be to become a global citizen and be culturally diverse. Emotional intelligence is a rewarding position to acquire and develop. The main ingredients of acquiring emotional intelligence are self-awareness, awareness of ones environment which includes other people, empathy to self and others, social awareness, relationship skills, responsible decision making, and emotional regulation. Personally, I am a huge proponent of awareness in general. With awareness, anything can be learned and changed.